Have you ever wondered what could be at the root of criticism or the cause of a distaste for someone that seems unwarranted?
I was talking to some young ministers recently who have become popular on the national landscape. They shared that they sense jealousy and criticism from their peers in response to what they say. I’ve noticed something kind of interesting. When we are being critical in ministry, or pick on other people, it’s often not because of something they said—it’s because of envy.
There are a few key elements to envy:
1. Envy is desiring something someone else has: In Mark 15:20, Pilate noted that it was for envy that the Jewish leaders brought Jesus forward for trial. This was very discerning of Pilate. You see, envy is an emotion you need to understand. If someone is doing something that you thought you could do but didn’t do, then you experience jealousy or envy. I’m never jealous of a prizefighter who knocks somebody out. I’m never jealous of a rock star who has a big following. You know why? I’m not a boxer and I’m not a singer. No matter the career field you are in, if you see someone attaining favor and results that you intuitively know you could have had also—but didn’t take the steps to get there—that’s envy! It’s essential to learn to celebrate the victories of others if we are to proceed with the right heart and walk in a place of favor.
2. Be on guard when envy creeps in: Start to watch where that comes from. The enemy wants to keep you focused on what you don’t have—on who you aren’t—instead of on who God made you to be and how far you’ve come.
3. Don’t try to be someone else: Comparison is the thief of joy and the death of authenticity. Be fully who you are. Recognize that God will never hold back anything from you that is in the field of possibility. Heaven plays no favorites. Your task is to fully develop your own capacity. When you are jealous or envious of others, it’s because someone else is attaining results of which you are also capable. Observe and figure out what steps they are taking that you haven’t yet.
Consider this: If you are the target of envy and jealousy, take it as the backhanded compliment that it is.
Ask yourself these questions: “Who am I critical of? Is jealousy the root of this criticism? Who am I comparing myself to? Do I need to let it go? Can I bear to hear others celebrated in my presence?”
Release all unhealthy comparisons. Discover your unique task. Work your own field! You are the only person who can be you and fulfill your call. Let the Lord speak to you about who you are and who you are meant to be.
How do you get over it when pastors and other leaders have actively criticized and tried to stifle what God is doing in your life? I find myself avoiding all pastors because of what some have done. I have chosen to forgive (still working on that one), but trust is an entirely different thing to me. I don’t want to be stuck in this place and develop bitterness and miss God’s plans. Please help!
Sharon-
Understand that you are not alone in your plight…I’ve talked with many people who have a deep and genuine desire to pursue God, yet find few able to connect with a church family for the same reasons.
Not “fitting in”, not having someone able to connect with your perspective can leave you feeling friendless, isolated and rejected.
This gives you a unique quality; the ability to have compassion for the downtrodden, the rejected, those “thrown away” by society. I think everyone desires that friend that is closer than a brother.
Even the artist Picasso complained he was unable to find anyone who could ‘return a ball’ he bounced in their direction.
Know that the Lord suffered this same rejection and take strength from knowing that your pursuit of Him is taking you in the right direction. And at those loneliest of times, thank Him that He has given you a true window into His heart…and trust that with Him, you are never alone. &)
Awesome! Great message to ponder on time and again! Thank you Sir.