Release The Hidden Child in You!

Children's Self Esteem

If you cut down an old tree you will see the rings of time on the inside. Some rings are thick and some are lean. The lean rings represent the years when there may not have been much rain, or perhaps they were years of drought.

Cut open the soul of any adult and you’ll see the rings. Some are more lean than others. The critical years are the childhood years. I try to remember that inside every adult is a child. This gets very practical from a training perspective. A wildly successful business trainer once taught me that inside of every person wearing a suit in my seminar is a 15 year old that is hoping to God my training won’t be boring. They want to peel that suit off and have fun.

Inside of each of us is our personal history, and no period of history is more important than the first 10-15 years…some say the first 5 or less. Happy are you if you had a nurturing loving parent and normal siblings. Unfortunately most of us did not have this. Instead of Dr. Dobson you might have had Dr. Frankenstein.

Instead of hearing messages that reinforced that you are IMPORTANT and CAPABLE you may have gotten the message that there is something inadequate about you. If you don’t get the message you need you can spend your entire life trying to prove you ARE IMPORTANT while always fighting a voice in your head that says you are “NOT ENOUGH.”

Curiously the unique revelation Jesus came to give us in Christianity was not about Himself. The revelation He came to give was that God is our Father…”Our Father who art in heaven…” Regardless of when you meet God as Father, you are destined to discover there is one who takes over the role of your parent. God your Father will fix the bucket where your sense of importance and capability leaks out. We may differ on “how” but we all agree on the end result. He re-waters the garden of your soul and brings you to the place where you no longer fear what man can do to you. You are accepted in the beloved Son, Jesus. You are COMPLETE in Him. You are NOT dysfunctional or addicted or screwed up. You are simply getting rewired to a new nature and identity.

In Gethsemane among a tangle of olive trees, crushed by the weight of cruel men, Jesus sought refuge in the embrace of the one He called “Abba Father.” This is the most intimate and endearing terminology possible. Abba is “Daddy”….

Father. May each of us find the place where we can not only stop leaking, but stop seeking substitutes for the love of God and a clean record. Then we become mature “sons” (and daughters) who carry this water on His behalf into the lives of others. Rather than pain, we bring grace, because all adults deep down are children, trying to be brave in a very scary world.

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

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27 thoughts on “Release The Hidden Child in You!

  1. truly you are doing great and your teaching is awesome. Hoping andPPraying that someday we can have a seminar here in manila, Phil. GOD BLESS

  2. I feel like my daughter was the most nurturing, encouraging and self-esteem building mother in the world to my wonderful grand daughter who is very talented and intelligent. But she struggles with depression. How can that be?

  3. Thanks Lance, Made me cry… I grew up feeling I was never enough… Family stuff and church. I am a widowed grandmother now and so getting it, how much my Daddy God loves and delights in me. Thanks for your wonderful teaching and encouragement.

  4. I love this. Didn’t always get that affirmation as a child which I realize as an adult probably helped to skew my idea of a loving heavenly Father that accepted me no matter what. To that end, I have purposed to instill in my grandson the fact that he is loved, he can do all things through Christ and he is more loved by God than he will ever know.

  5. Funny coincidence, this post. I just watched The Adjustment Bureau the other night, and it hit me today that ‘The Chairman’ seemed oddly familiar. And then I realized, that is how I viewed God, growing up.I thought He was a remote,proper,stern,judgemental,disapproving ‘Person’ somewhere out there, never quite happy with what I was doing, always trying to steer me away from what I wanted, because what I REALLy wanted, always cost something.Hmm. What to do with this…I so want to know what He really is like.

  6. Thank you for this – it’s so important for everyone to remember. I have a friend who doesn’t email and is struggling right now with this very issue. I will share this with her. You are always a blessing, Lance, thanks.

  7. Most of my life has not been in a nurturing, loving place. I sensed this hidden child in me who peeks out once in a while when she thinks it is safe. I am learning that God is MY Daddy who loves me just because He does. When life gets scary, I can run to Him, jump up on His lap and feel His love envelope me. I am growing in the knowing of who He is and who I am in Him…completely loved, completely healed, completely accepted, completely forgiven, completely His. I have stopped leaking and now am able to carry this water and share it wherever He leads.

  8. The reality of the real you comes forth when you know that you came from Papa God’s heart. His original intent was for you was to connect the purpose of knowing Him, in knowing Him, we see our worth and value. No longer orphaned, but belonging and fitting into our original intent and purpose!

  9. Your words above, brought me to a deeper sense of intercessory prayer for my adult children who struggle with various mental and emotional strongholds that i believe stem from growing up with a physically absent father and an emotionally absent mother. I didn’t know the Lord until they were adults and already parents themselves. Only now am i beginning to see what my children truly needed during their childhood, which of course i didn’t know to give then. Along with prayer, is there anything else a parent do for our children that didn’t get what they needed while growing up? Even when we are exposed to the ways of the Lord, sometimes the wounded and broken places in our lives hinder us from fully understanding and receiving God’s love. It took me over 50 years to trust God because of my own broken childhood. What can parents like me do now to help our children heal from the mistakes of our parental ignorance?

    • The Lord is so merciful. He wants all our children healed. I am a 70 yr old single mom who suffered from severe PTSD while raising my children. I have carried a load of guilt ingrained in me by my biological parents and the guilt over the failures raising my children. I believe my healing has come as a result of the word of God intensely studying and restructuring my world few and my faith according to the Bible and not to the teachings of the ‘ American Church’. Our church culture is very much like the Jewish Church when Christ came. It is not helpful. It perpetuates shame, and guilt. The stories of Joseph and Moses are good examples of this problem. In the “church”, if you continue to change in a way that does not agree with and promote the cultural enity you are involved with, you are rejected and shamed. How woulds the church have treated Moses if he was an outcast for 40 years because he murdered someone? But he was exactly where he was supposed to be. Those 40 yrs were surly uncomfortable and full of shame and guilt. During that time he wasn’t going to church, he wasn’t, even serving a community. He was all alone, some of the time. But at the end of himself. He knew he could do nothing!!!!!!!! But then he was ready to learn what God could do through him.

      Sunday my youngest son and I went out for lunch. As we were visiting about the events of our lives my son expressed how two of his well educated friends tend to make him feel bad (not their fault) for not finishing college. The fault of that falls heavily on my shoulders because I could not provide the money, support or guidance. He could easily have gotten a scholarship but his self esteem was too battered by my problems with PTSD. He is now at 35 pretty well matured threw those difficulties. But he was maturing when his friends were going to college. This is what I told him, ‘God promises us that all things work together for good.” Rom. 8:28. Moses could have been Pharoah of Egypt and saved the Jews that way but God had another plan and He has another plan for you. Our job is to believe ‘all things work together for good’ to the very core of our being. The Cristian culture says, the first are and will be first, but the word of God says’ the last will be first ‘!!!. I hope this has been helpful. If you will contact me at judiks@gmail .com I have some sermon videos I can send to you that have been the source of reprograming my mind to a Bibical veiw. judi